Wednesday, 30 October 2013

Bedtime for Baby

Mommy is really very easily amused. And I'm honestly not sure she's all that bright.

We have been playing this peek-a-boo game for twenty minutes straight now. Peek-a-boo. (Honestly? You thought I disappeared when I put a towel over my head? I'm RIGHT HERE.) But it seems to make her happy, so I suppose we can carry on for a while.

Although I am getting rather tired.

I don't know what time it is (they keep the clocks absurdly high up in this house) but it's dark outside and the other boys have been in bed for a long time. Honestly, if I wasn't able to take one for the team and stay awake to keep Mommy entertained, I don't know what she'd do. Those other two are bloody lucky I'm willing to cover the night shift for them.

Oh, Mommy. More kisses? (sigh.) Do you never get tired of kisses? Mmm, you smell good Mommy. Let's snuggle. Wait - wait - that's my tummy - ahahaha - omigosh that tickles - wait - stop - ahaha - no don't stop - that tickles - ahahaha - oh Mommy. I love you Mommy. Yes, big squeeze. Yes, I'm your baby.

Wait - what are you doing? Why are you handing me to the Daddy? I didn't authorize this. Where are you going? Mommy, where are you going? Omigosh-Mommy-where-are-you-going? Wahwahwahwahwahwah (gasp) wahwahwahwahwah, oh thank God you're back. Come here, pick me up. Immediately. Don't do that again. EVER. We really must discuss this bathroom thing. You have taken me to the bathroom before - when we're out running errands, when we're in a restaurant, when I'm throwing a fit and it's just the two of us at home. You know this, and I know this. I really see no reason for you to just hand me off to the Daddy simply because he happens to be here. No offence, Daddy, I think you're super. But you ARE NOT Mommy.

All right. I'm hungry. Feed me, please. Immediately.
No, not an orange. Did I not just clearly say banana? No, not a cracker, either. My God, are you deaf? I WANT A BANANA. I realize I don't have the firmest grasp on language yet, I'm working on it, but I'm making the sounds and pointing and, frankly, we spend all day together every single day. You are usually able to work out what I'm saying. Put a little more effort into it, please. We're in this together here.

Now I'm thirsty. Water. Where's my sippy cup?
No, nevermind, I'm not thirsty. Let's see what else we can do with this water, shall we? I've noticed if you pour it out of the cup it's a lot more fun - look, it goes everywhere, and now we can splash and play and smear it around - hey, what are you doing? I was playing with that. I am trying to keep us both entertained here, and frankly, you're not giving me a lot to work with.

(sigh.) Forget it. I'm getting backup.

Wait, Mommy. Wait. Why are you picking me up? I just climbed up onto my big brother's bed. Which was a fair amount of work, I'll have you know. I could have had him up in just a minute. He could have helped us. He's lots of fun.

Ohhh, your sweater's soft. I'm just going to snuggle in for a minute. Don't worry, I won't fall asleep on you. Just...want...mmmmm...comfy. Love you, Mommy.

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